Friday, April 29, 2011

William & Kate: A Royal Wedding

I felt that if I didn't post anything about this event, I would regret it later on. As I have not seen the wedding, am not seeing the wedding, and don't plan on watching this "modern fairy tale unfold", I decided I would blog about everything else that encompasses said wedding.

First of all, has anyone heard about how Lily Allen is bloody pissed that she didn't get an invite. Lily Allen is most known for her troubled life then her music career. The woman is a great singer but she is as vile and raunchy as any hard rockers out there who lived a life of turmoil. Now, when you know those two tid bits of info, do you really wonder why our most elegant Queen has not invited Lily Allen to attend the prestigious ceremony? Seriously, fuck off Allen and go bother people who actually give a shit about your declining music career. (It doesn't have much to fall down from, rest assured folks, she will recover and then become a sucessful ice cream eater.)

Secondly, am I the only who is irked at all the side merchandise that is being shovelled off the wagons lately. And then one wonders: what will they do with all this money? I know the Royal Family is really "big" on donating money (for tax reasons, no doubt) but how shameful of them to authorize the production of condoms with the photo of the Royal Couple and the very suggestive title: Protect your family jewels. Funny, yet tasteless when it comes to representing the one true family that really brings the people of Earth togheter. If you haven't noticed the sarcasm, you must be British.

To finish this rant with style, its that people stopped giving a damn when the best thing to ever happen to the Royal Family was taken away by death. The masses that followed the everyday blessings of Diana turned a blind eye to the family except for the rare time they would appear in western newspapers because of scandals. Scandals have brought our attention back to the Family time and time again.

So the main reason to avoid this so-called "Event of the Millenium" is because it'll end up, inevitably, in a scandal. The British Royal Family does what Royal Families do best: scandalize. They lost our attention, our sympathy, our dedication to causes supported by the Royals of England. If they thought a wedding would work into getting the world back in the pockets of Queen Lizzy, they thought right. People, from all over the world, are tuning in for the "most talked-about event of the century," "the modern fairy-tale brought to life", "the event you don't wanna miss" (do you hear Ryan Seacrest too?).

So in who's pocket are we exactly? The Queen or the media?


Candles are out,
Elevens Ink

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